Gratitude during Chaotic times
Last week I talked about forgiveness and how we can be more forgiving towards ourselves and others. As a natural progression, this week I want to talk about Gratitude, and a practice that bridges Forgiveness with Gratitude. This year has been a year like none other for most people alive. This Thanksgiving will likely look different than years passed. The holidays are often stressful on their own, and this year will have added layers of stress we have not encountered before. The normal traditions might not be possible with Covid restrictions, changes to travel, and limitations of gathering size. But from adversity, comes creativity. I’m sure new traditions will also be formed this year. I think all people will have a better sense of what is actually important this holiday season.
People are going to be more run down, and it may be harder to get in the Holiday mindset. Now more than ever, it is important to give thanks to our loved ones and show our appreciation for everything we do have. Gratitude makes us and others feel good. It’s free to give love, understanding, patience, and appreciation. So much has been taken this year, and yet, so much remains! There is hope, even when things feel darkest. Older generations have lived through dramatic societal shifts before and are proof of human’s ability to be resilient. There is much unknown right now and much that will still change before this year is up. Gratitude can feel hard presently, when the world feels as though it is crumbling. However, Gratitude will give us relief from our suffering and help us focus on everything that will get us through these challenging times.
Gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring your feelings or the pain in the world right now.
It is still important to acknowledge how we feel, and never ignore the messages of our emotions. We can practice gratitude by acknowledging both our hardships and what is going well. For example, this might sound like “I’m so anxious today, but I’m grateful to have people who support me through it.” Or “I’m so sad I can’t be there, but I’m grateful we can still Facetime.” In this way we honor the truth and the hardship we’re feeling, while still acknowledging what we have to be thankful for.
Let Gratitude be the lens you see the world through. When we focus more on Gratitude, we notice more what we and others around us are doing well. We’re able to see more clearly what is working in our lives and continue to take more of those actions. It’s important to take time to recognize and appreciate everything that’s going well for you, or that you are doing well. It’s so easy to criticize yourself for everything you feel you’re messing up, so find balance here by also taking time to recognize the opposite.
How can gratitude help us?
If we have been hurt by someone or something it can be hard to find gratitude for that person or the experience. However, we can learn something from everything we experience. When you look for the lesson, it can be easier to find forgiveness, and then give Gratitude. Sometimes the only gratitude we can find is to say “I’m grateful I’m not like them” or “I’m grateful they showed me who I don’t want to be.” Shame, guilt, fear, and grief are the greatest sources of pain, and are the lowest emotions vibrationally speaking. They are the emotions that cause us to shut down and close our hearts to the world the most. On the other hand, Gratitude is one of the highest vibrational emotions. Gratitude literally opens our heart. It allows us to be more compassionate, patient, and understanding with ourselves and others.
Gratitude is a practice.
As much as you can, shift your thoughts and mindset to gratitude, and your world will change. A good way to practice Gratitude is to use the Ho’oponopono Prayer. This is an ancient healing practice from Hawaii. It is a tool for internal reconciliation, which encourages love and balance. This Prayer literally translates to “move into balance” and goes like this: I’m Sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I Love You. You repeat this phrase including yourself, and anyone you wish to have peace between.
You can repeat this as many times as you would like towards yourself, or the person you choose. It can be helpful to be in meditation when you practice this. You can repeat it for different people who have hurt you, or who are driving you crazy currently to find more peace towards them. You can also get a little more detailed when you say “I’m sorry…” or “please forgive me…,” but you don’t have to. You don’t have to start with someone who has caused you a lot of pain. You can start with a friend who did something recently. Someone you don’t want to be mad at ultimately, but are a little bit right now. Try this practice with them and see if it helps shift you more into balance and gratitude towards them.
So, for example, if using towards yourself this might sound like:
I’m sorry for hurting you, Sarah. Please forgive me. Thank you, Sarah. I love you. Or I’m sorry, Sarah. Please forgive me for judging you. Thank you for accepting me. I love you.
When using towards someone else it might sound like: I’m sorry for being upset at you, Kevin. I forgive you for not showing up when you said you would. Thank you for being my friend. I love you. OR I’m sorry for being annoyed with you. I forgive you for the hurtful comment you made, Jason. Thank you for understanding. I love you.
You don’t have to say any of this to the actual person. This is a practice you do on your own and for yourself. We can’t change other people, but we can change how we respond to them. This practice allows you to be less triggered by the person or the pain associated with them, and have less resentment towards them in time. Trying to send gratitude to someone who hurt you is powerful medicine. It’s about taking your power back. It’s about releasing yourself, and not waiting for anyone else to release you.
Be specific to help get to the root of the matter. This can help you target forgiveness and gratitude for specific behaviors or actions, which can also help you see patterns and better understand your needs. This can be a great model to help prepare you when you feel it’s time to have an actual conversation with the person, if it needs to get to that point. Only you will know. Sometimes little things linger when they don’t need to. This can be a great way to let them go and focus on what is truly important.
Gratitude changes our brain and creates new neural networks. These new networks allow us to live in more balance with positive emotions and outcomes. Adding a gratitude practice will change your life for the better. You can start by waking up each morning, and thinking about 5-10 things you are grateful for, before you even open your eyes. Starting your day with gratitude will immediately start your day in a positive and expanded mindset. Use this practice to get through the Holidays with family and friends, who you may love, but can also drive you quite crazy! I’m sending you and your family many blessings of abundance, joy, laughter, and peace.
If you would like support and to learn how to cultivate more gratitude in your life, click here to learn more about Private sessions with me.
Sarah Seraphina is a Spiritual Activator and Liberation Guide. She is the owner of Nurtured Essence, a healing space, aimed at helping women overcome their past patterns and fears, so they may thrive and live with more power, purpose, ease, and joy. She specializes in working with healers, recovering empaths and “Damsels in Distress”, highly-sensitive women, lightworkers, and women with a sacred mission.
